I
don’t know why, I don’t know how, but I returned the favor. I was like the
biggest lap dog ever. Coming from the beginning I would have never done such
things. But she taught me everything I needed to know, should’ve known, wanted
to know, and didn’t need to ever know. It still burns me inside as to why I
have opened up so much to her. Is it because she’s everything I ever wanted? Or
everything I ever needed? Or is it because she’s me in split image and I don’t
want to face it. Yet I face it everyday because I’m with her every day.
I stand side by side
with her looking out of the blown window. Looking out at the city, everything
that stands in her way, yet is her only protection, sanity. I look over, blood
dripping on the floor. I follow the blood trail looking up leading to her hand.
I look behind me and see Chief Lt. Riggs crying, bloodied on the floor. Then I
look down at her from the copter. At least 26 bloodied men all around her on
the ground. Standing ever so bold with her gun on the floor next to her. Then I
see her in front of me with her hand opened, looking like a metal rocket with
shining power producing loud blasts and gusts of wind. I look over her shoulder
to see them get evaporated into the broad light of day. Later, I hold her in my
arms. Her tears saturating my face; her long lost cousin buried behind her. The
screams in my ear, the holes in the ground, the blood in the grass. Now, I look
into her face and see the flame smile, the ice in her expression, and the pain
in her eyes. The cold in her posture. “I couldn’t do this without you Al.”
I was there. Like she
told me she would be for me. I didn’t believe her. I couldn’t believe anybody.
I was a loner. An assassin. A killer. But not anymore. I was a partner, a team
member, a desired lover, but instead a safe friend. I was her life, and she was
mine. I didn’t have a life until her. I was dead. Dead inside. And she brought
me into her arms, under her wing, and into her life. And believe me, her life
is the hardest to be let into to. General Major Captain Kayvroni Washamarou.
“You can call me Kay, welcome aboard.”
"Doughnut?"
I
was a little confused why she was screaming doughnut on the top of her lungs.
“Well if your going to follow me and not be very stealthy about it, I might as
well ask you if you want a doughnut. Because I- am going to get a doughnut, therefore
you’re going where I am going so I figured I’d ask if you want a doughnut. SO DO
YOU WANNA DOUGHNUT!?” I thought she was crazy. I didn’t think she was anything
what she lived up to. In a matter of 30 seconds and one babbling sentence, all
of my expectations went threw the window. “NO. I don’t want a fucking doughnut.” I
stared at her with my usual stare that I use when I want to intimidate people.
“That’s a funny looking stare you got goin’ on. Is it supposed to be
intimidating?” –She’s insane. I am following the wrong person. “Sit,” she told
me. So there I was, watching her munch out on a doughnut. “So, if your not going
to talk I wanna let you know something. By the ice cold look in your eyes, and
I don’t mean your nastiness. I mean your blue eyes. You think you look
intimidating because your always squinting when really the real reason why your
squinting is because your eyes are blue and the sun reflects off of them making
it harder to actually see without squinting. So there goes that face. As for
the pain in your
eyes you might wanna get a huge band-aid because I am not here to help you with
that, that is not what I do so if your looking for answers, I do not have them.
As for your gun hand, you gotta ease up on the trigger a little bit. Your too
hard, your grip is too hard. If you soften it up you’ll have an easier and
faster trigger finger. And for your kicks? They can be a little higher.” She’s
telling me this as she’s stuffing her mouth. Real professional I thought. “I am
not here to be professional, stop thinking that,” she said. A bit took off on how she just read my
mind I continued to watch the sprinkles go flying everywhere. I looked down for
a second and when I came up her face was so close to me I saw her chewed up
food. After she swallowed she said “If you wanna kill me, your too late.” She
got up and left.
So when I left I was
thinking to myself, -okay, so I just got profiled by someone who I thought I
was after but she lead my expectations to completely fly away, plus I have
chewed up sprinkles on my shirt. But I looked into it deeper and everything she
said, was right. I don’t think I’m intimidating. The people around me lead for
me to believe that I was. They created who I Am. Not me. And it was true. So I
went off to walking and thinking around the town. Thinking if I was really
after the right person, or if I really was just after some answers. But I
figured it out. Eventually.
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